Recently, I cut off 8 inches of hair.

I was fairly certain Mike never even knew because I always wear my hair up when I am around the kids since hair pulling is not my idea of fun.

Last Saturday, Mike and I were invited to a 40th birthday party for one of his high school friends. If you know Mike at all, you know that he has good friends from high school still - and somehow manages to maintain these good friendships by seeing his friends or talking to his friends once a year. This being said I have not seen Marty, myself, since Brody's second birthday party. he is 3 1/2.

I decided to get all crazy and blow dry my newly cut normally curly hair stick straight.

Mike and I then proceed to leave the house with him never saying a word about it. I found this truly amazing for him to not notice the 8 inches missing from my head as well as the fact that it looked totally different. I finally asked him about it. He looked confused and then surprised.

And yet, upon arriving to Marty's house, the first thing he does is give me a hug and say "what happened to your hair?".

I am at a point in my weight loss where everything I currently own looks like a potato sack. I am proud of this, of course, except that everything I own currently looks like a potato sack.

Of course I saved all of my before I got married clothes because - for sure I was going to fit right back into them as soon as I had Brody.

I was invited on a girls overnight trip which I am ecstatic about because I have seriously not been out with just girls and no kids in years. For real. So, my new goal is to lose my last bit of weight in 2 weeks so that I can wear the before I got married clothes rather than the potato sacks.

This is going to be done by continuing my low carb diet and cutting out alcohol.

Alcohol: A way to wind down at the end of the day with my husband (outside) (away from the kids) after a long day of 4 kids driving me nuts.

this could be an interesting 2 weeks.

The doctor is in

Yesterday I received a phone call from my neighbor who started the conversation off by saying "Christy, I need some parenting advice".

I felt extremely proud despite the fact that 1 kid was outside in the dirt with no shoes, the 3 year old was carrying around some rusted railroad ties, the 3rd was "cleaning" her shower hating me for making her do it, and the 14 year old was sitting outside with his feet up drinking his 2nd Mountain Dew in 2 hours.

"What can I do for you?" I asked proudly.

Apparently her 2 years old twins are sick, but 1 of them has been vomiting all morning. I immediately felt at ease because unfortunately, I have become an expert in vomiting kids.

She says "Amy has thrown up 5 times already. What can I do?" She then proceeded to tell me the list of things she tried to feed Amy - Milk, yogurt, vegtables -

May I just say (and maybe it is just me) that I have never once thrown up and then thought wow! I would love a giant glass of milk right now!

I start panicking and trying to come up with a response where I can say Wow! Your crazy! Without saying "Wow! Your crazy"

So, being Dr. Christy as I am, I pull out my crazy magic tricks and suggest Pedialite and toast, and then tell her that dairy is probably the worst thing you can give her.

So about 10 minutes later I hike over to her house, and she is shaking nervous. So I gave her the 2 best pieces of advice I had for her.

1) If she is crying real tears, she is not dehydrated.

2) Although no one wants a puking child, everyone wants the extra time that their sleeping all day provides.

Wished her good luck and went back to my house to clean up the tiki torch oil off of Harlee who Mike and Jesse were watching.

The lesser of two evils

Confession: I have slept through the night 1 time in the past 2 years. This is due to insomnia and the fact that I have to go in to Harlee's room at least twice a night - move her crib to find the pacifier that she has lost and shove it back in her mouth.

Every time I do it, I want to kick my own ass for her having it at all and repeat over and over as I am laying in bed "trying" to "fall asleep" that this will be the last night.


Then there is daytime.

My kid has zero coping skills. It is pandemonium if she is not happy. This could be caused, for example because she is strapped to the shopping cart in a 5 point harness and she would rather nose dive out of the cart and knock her self unconscious or because Brody is playing with a hammer and won't give it to her. And it comes on suddenly, and LOUD, and doesn't end quickly. This is all nothing new, and it is all the reason I started her on the pacifier at 4 months (you know, the month they tell you to get rid of it by??).

So, here I am trying to figure out the lesser of the two evils?

Me trying to sleep at night and exist during the day with her screaming ways.

Or

Keep the pacifier until she is 18 and deal with the lack of sleep.

Stellar parenting..

Brody has now entered what to me is his most annoying phase to date. And, sadly, I think I may have caused it.

So 2 months ago, we (me and my herd of children) went to Robin's brothers. They have, in the store, a play area for kids because apparently people buying engagement rings need something to occupy their children...to each their own, but just sayin'.

Seconds upon wandering into the store, Brody ran off for the play area. I picked up my newly sized engagement ring I haven't worn since before my feet and hands grew 100 sizes (Thank you pregnancy), and we left.

We only walked for about 4 minutes down the mall before I yelled "Where is Brody?" And the J's and I proceeded to stare with wide eyes, and all 3 of us were trying to figure out what the F had happened to him. Finally the IB student proclaimed "OMG we left him in the store!" (Brownie points for him for having an answer!). He bolted back to get him and I ran pushing the stroller behind him and there was my Brody. Crying hysterically in the arms of the angry Robins brothers associate. Jesse, walked up to her and grabbed Brody and ran back out the door.

wow did we all feel stupid.

Don't worry if your thinking I am an a-hole parent. My payback is here in the form of the above mentioned "worst phase ever".

Consequently now, if I go into the bathroom, or the kitchen or anywhere that is not right next to him, he will freak out. "Mom, what are you doing?" "Mom, where are you going?" "Mom," "Mom" "Mom" and he typically can be found wrapped around my feet while I am trying to walk.

I am really hoping this is a normal phase for all kids that will pass quickly because the alternative is that I have scarred him for life...

$$

In this nerve wracking time right now that I am awaiting my fate with school and the necessity of my geting a job immediatley, I have to say...

Swagbucks how I love you.

With my school, I spend about 5 hours a day searching the internet. I use swagbucks to search, earn swagbucks, and then save them up for gift cards.

My favorite being the amazon.com gift card.

I usually seem to earn a gift card every other week for doing nothing but working on school.

Swagbucks


At least it makes school good for something right now.

I was able to get myself some reference materials for school and some hardcore hand healing lotion for free. Thank you Amazon Prime, for your free 2 day shipping.

Lately, I have become obsessed with coupons.

The $350.00 a week grocery bill was not working out anymore. And, that 350.00 didn't even include any meat!

So, yes, I am that girl now. But I tell you what, I have cut the bill down to about $150.00 - $200.00 a week.

And the checker even complimented me. Hey, I am surrounded by kids ALL day and married to Mike, I will take a compliment from a stranger.

This savings has inspired me to put more time and effort into buying things, and seriously, I am horrified at how much money I have wasted in my life.

It takes 30 seconds to search (using swagbucks) for printable coupons to wherever your going....

Tract houses

Most people live in homes near others. In fact, I have never heard of driving to your neighbors house unless you live in Nebraska. But whatever.

Needless to say, we do. Drive to our neighbors that is.

We are also surrounded by endless weeds. So what if our entire housing area flooded with rain. This produces nothing more than...weeds.

These weeds dry out...and produce dead weeds. This combined with heat produces fire- If provoked.

Okay, enough higher education science.

All of this BS equals an unnecessary fear of my house burning down.....

Fair.

We live on 2 1/2 acres of dirt, weeds and crap surrounding our small house of "valuables" Please know I use that term loosely.

So, anytime some A-hole has a fire at his house, I feel as though the death of our pile of house is near.

For instance, as I sit here typing, I smell fire.

Do I either A) wait for the demise of my household or B) Make a drink and sit on the deck watching the firetrucks try to find their way around here?

I chose C) none of the above - instead do your schoolwork online and pretend you don't smell it but really you are dying to go outside an investigate because you cannot take it any longer.......and it is only a matter of time before you actually do.

But really, given my people around here, the real story is probably something only some could image.